The Scallions action plan is nicknamed JIC. Stands for Jan's Inner Circle. Kind of a nice girlie touch, don't you think? Should soften things somewhat for your cabinet members masking the cruel and unusual punishment which awaits future border crashers.
Gotta love it. There are so many mixes you can add to the vuv. Opera? Classics of Mahler, Bach, and other legends? Absolutely no maracas in the mix though. We don't want this stuff to sound like the barrio. Change the mix to country? One that would turn them around as they tire is that oldie "come a little closer, your my kind of man, so big and so strong,come a little closer the nights are so long". They'll' turn and sprint for their adobes. horniness will prevail. To really mess more with their heads, one great mixing sound from my Wisconsin days would be In Heaven there is no Beer. Listen below and imagine the vuvus and the kazoos going at the same time. You might be able to get this on U-Tube in Spanish. I'm sure some of your personal favorites like Karen and Richard Carpenter, the Captain and Teniel would have them dry heaving to those lyrics.
Not only are the sounds of the vuv mixed with other music a fun part for you and your staff, it also could help you in a Scallion's team building session in the future. Let's plan on discussing some extra services like team building from Scallions Sinister Spin later. Now for the crusher!!! I'm sure you're familiar with Clint Eastwood. We met Dirty Harry himself earlier this week regarding using some of his Spaghetti Western material for the border battle. He went bananas. He donned his old "Man with No Name" outfit, spit, nodded and said "go ahead, make my day". He's so Right! He's Republican!! He's in!!!
Clint has OK'd the double barrel approach we're suggesting for you with a more brutal changes. Pretty nasty guy for 80.
First of all, we will be installing 50 really big screen 3-D TVs staggered just inside our border. These will be seen from at least five miles into Mexico. Old footage of Clint in The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly, Fistful of Dollars, and For a Few Dollars More mowing down Mexicans will be on constant run. A few of Clint's classic lines like "In this world, there's two kinds of people my friend, those with loaded guns and those who dig. You dig" will be dubbed in. Enough to scare the living carumba out of their culos as they watch Clint off thousands of their Illegal ancestors.
I'm sorry there was so much detail to this presentation. My wife told me I need to get to the point, but we all aren't like her -- going so fast that she forgets to make any points at all. Anyway, that's a personal thing. Jan, I'll be back to you this next week to bond over our mutual interests. In the meantime, have a great 4th of July. "Don't worry, be Happy"! We'll get them before the Feds get you!! -- G. Scallions