Sunday, May 1, 2011

Na'vi Giants Awarded Second Cleveland National Basketball Association Franchise

With too many Na'vi extras sitting on the bench awaiting a sequel to Avatar, the film's producers have recently given an unconditional release to an unknown number of these ten foot tall neon blue athletic speedsters to pursue other interests.

Here Come the Na'vi Giants

Noticeably missing from the list of presenters at the Academy Awards on February 27th, reliable sports sources told us that a number of these "giant blue neon macho men with big wagging tails" were spotted dining last week in Cleveland, Ohio with NBA Commissioner David Stern, Cleveland's mayor, along with a number of city officials.

The Leaky Wick has just leaked minutes ago that Cleveland has been awarded a second NBA franchise to be named the Cleveland Na'vi Giants. The official announcement from the NBA is expected to to made when the NBA playoffs end sometime in late August, early September.

The anemic Cleveland Cavaliers will be renamed and moved to Toledo, Ohio. These shifts are expected to take place in 2013. Initial reaction to this leak from the Wiki in NBA locker rooms has been harsh. Most critical have been some of the Leagues "big men" and "dream team" superstars for questionable reasons.

Yoa Ming, the 7'6" Houston Rockets center of who has been out for eight years with injuries feels this move makes it impossible for short Asian prospects to catch on with any team. Translated through his interpreter, Ming summed up his feelings stating that the NBA should limit the height of new players to seven feet.

"Yo, Ming! Could You Play the Guqin Zither for us"? inquired Conductor Shaq obviously concerned about Yao's future.

As for the Shaq, he believes with the influx of the Na'vi's he'll be out of a job in a couple years. "Ben Stein tipped me off on the Na'vi b'ball infestation as soon as Avatar came out on DVD. I'm already in line to become the conductor of the Boston Pops in 2012, so hoops is just a well paying part time hobby for me now", said the big fella.

"Even so," said the Shaq Attack , "the height advantage this blue team will have over guys like Yoa and me is really unfair. All these 10' blue guys have to do is just plant themselves under the basket and dunk the ball". Shaq lamented further, "I've heard they are even good free throw shooters".

The Miami Heat "Dream Team " three musketeers, LaBaron James, Bo Wade, and Chris Bosh we're in tears when interviewed on a local sports talk show. "Really, why would the NBA allow these freaks from Pandora to highjack an honorable sport like pro basketball" whined Bosch. My buds Bo and LaBaron, and I have always hoped that the days of dynasties ended with Michael Jordan.

James who had walked away from Cleveland breaking the hearts of die hard Cavalier fans was visibly shaken. "I left Cleveland and went to Miami just to have fun with my pals Bo and Chris. Wasn't about the money. I know I would be welcome back in Cleveland and I'd have fun with my new Na'vi friends, even if I had to sit on the bench. See man, it's not about the money".


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